Uh oh, Mommy's not feeling so good

Somebody really needs to write a book called "Stuff about being a new mom nobody bothers to tell you" 

For example, nobody tells you how stinky baby poo becomes as they get older. Nobody tells you when you should take your kid to the paediatrician or when a trip to the GP will suffice. Nobody tells you that sometimes you and your husband will fight over whether or not the baby's bottle is the right temperature. This  is important stuff. Why don't they tell you this?!

I think Chapter 3 of "Stuff about being a new mom nobody bothers to tell you" will be dedicated to what happens when mom gets sick. The internet and my baby books are filled to the brim with info on what to do when the baby is sick but there's nothing about mom taking ill. There's no paragraph on feeling guilty because you're sick. No subsection explains how to deal with relying on hubby to do the evening feeds, settling baby down to sleep for the night and then prepping the bottles for the next day. There isn't a little footer for hubby saying what he should and shouldn't pack in the baby's bag and he can't ask wifey because she's sleeping already. 

Come on man, why didn't anybody write about this before? 

I shall break the chapter down into "You're sick. Just rest and get better" and then for the dads there's "How to multitask like Mom" and a blank section called "Mom's emergency notes, use only in case of Mom illness" where I'd write down all the little details Trevor wouldn't know. 

I'm writing all this in a bid to make light of the situation. I genuinely feel awful and I'm headed off to the doctor as soon as I'm done typing. 

My heart is heavy because I'm torn between needing to care for myself and wanting to care for Wren-Lee. The time I spend with her in the evening is precious and I don't give it up easily. But it would be unfair of me to handle her when I'm not healthy and I risk getting her sick too. 

Trevor did some heavy persuading to get me to make an appointment to get checked out and he's assured me he can do Daddy Duty so I can take it easy. I suspect I'll be fielding many questions but rather that than eventually ending up in hospital with something that started off as just a sinus infection (at least that's what I think I have). 

I really do wish a book had told me that something as silly as a little cold could bring up so many conflicting emotions. This moment of vulnerability reminds me that even Supermom has kryptonite. Mine happens to be my sinus and an unwillingness to accept that sometimes in putting my needs first, I'm actually doing what's best for Wren. 

Chapter 4 of "Stuff about being a new mom nobody bothers to tell you" should be, "You're human. It's ok."